Love That Will Never Be
by KathrynMooMoo
Summary: The Doctor and Rose's thoughts after their goodbyes on the beach.10&Rose. Please read and review


Love That will Never Be

_Oh I feel such a fool!_

. _Why couldn't I say it? I've had so many chances! And now I'll never get to say it! _

_I've lost Rose. The person I love most in the world, and I will never see her again. Three _

_Little words! That's all! I can't believe it._

_Oh well, I'm still the doctor, same old life, traveling around space and time, fighting off aliens. Only its NOT the same life! 'Cause Rose can no longer be in it! There's no way I can change it. Well of course there is a way, I have a time traveling space ship. I could easily go back in time and change it. But I can't its against the rules._

_Hmmm what to do in a time of depression? If only rose were here, she'd know what to do. Shut up doctor! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!... Ouch I should not have hit myself on the head! Hmmm, maybe I'll have a banana...bananas are good! Full of potassium. Yes a banana will sort all of my worries! And if an alien attacks I can use it as a gun! Yeah… not my best idea._

_I don't usually sleep, but maybe I will for a change, take my mind off things. Well Thing. Rose. I love you. It's so simple! But why couldn't I say it! I could have let go, and caught her. We would have been trapped in the void, but least we'd of been together, although strictly speaking we would be dead, killed by a mixture of Daleks and cybermen. Yeah not good._

_Erm…maybe just maybe I could find another crack in between the two worlds and find her again, even if its not for long just to say to her "I love you" but…but what if in parallel world time is different to this world? It could be years ahead and she could of moved on, got together with Mickey or someone else; she could have a family of her own!_

_Perhaps I could go back in time to one of the times when I could of said it, like when we met up with Sarah-Jane, or when I went down the pit and fought satin? I could, but what would that change? She's still gone! Oh this is impossible! Why didn't I say it when I had the chance!_

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"_Oh mum! I can't believe it! He's gone! The one person I have ever loved and he's just, just gone!_

"_Now now love, I'm sure you'll meet someone else, and least they won't be able to leave you!"_

_She just didn't understand. I don't want to find someone else! I want the Doctor! I want to see his handsome face, his chocolate brown eyes that just make me melt. His wild hair that could never be tamed. Even his pinstriped suit! _

_I know he loves me to, but I just can't believe he couldn't say it! Ha, he always was one to leave things till the last moment. But for once he waited a moment too long. Its just gunna be so hard! So much is going to remind me of him! Even everyday objects and, food, bananas, how he loved his bananas._

_Well, least I can still work with aliens at torchwood, like I said; I reckon I know a fair bit about them. If it wasn't for the doctor I still wouldn't know anything about them. I owe so much to him, before him I worked in a shop. Yes I was a shop girl. Fun life aye? Nah. _

_Then again, I found my dad, ok well parallel dad, but if we hadn't gone back in town I would never of known who or what he looked like, and mum would never have been happy again._

_I just feel so helpless. I know there is nothing I can do, but I just wish that there was something! What can I do with my life now? Without adventure, and nearly being killed on a regular basis? Nothing is going to fill that hole. The hole that the doctor used to fill. The large part of me that now feels like an empty space. Its going to be impossible to live life like a normal person, I won't even be able to watch regular T.V with mum when she's watching "The weakest link" as I'll always be reminded of when The Doctor, Jack and I were on satellite 5, and when he saved me from being killed by the Anndriode, and when I returned the favour by saving him from the Daleks, I mean its not hard, you know, just take in the time vortex... Its fine! Who am I kidding! I nearly killed myself…again, and the only way I could be saved was by him kissing me. The kiss that just melted me completely, his lips against mine. It was just pure…pure bliss! I didn't want it to end, it was perfect. _

_Then he regenerated, I don't think I have ever felt more worried! I thought he was going to die! Even though I was furious at him for just changing like that, inside I knew he was still the same old doctor. My Doctor. And Mickey, he was just so brilliant, I dumped him for The Doctor, and yet he was so sympathetic, and loyal to me. It must have been hard for him, seeing me cry about the man I love, when he loved me. _

_I'll never forget that day on the beach in Norway, when I saw him again, adrenalin rushed through me as I thought he had come back for me, when he could of just left, gone to another planet, after all it had been three months, but no, he came back to say goodbye to me. I'll never forget him. How can I? Its just…_

* * *

_Every where I look around the TARDIS something catches my eye. That something belongs to Rose, just looking at it makes me hurt inside. I can't get rid of it, it's Rose's stuff, I if keep it I can still have hope that one day she can return. But I can't just leave it lying around. It's too painful. My TARIDS aye? So much room, yet I don't know where to put my lost loves items. Somewhere where I can still see them when I want yet, if anyone joins me they can't. I don't know. It just going to be tough from now! Rose Tyler I still love you, and I always will, it's just…_

* * *

_Love that will never be_

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**Hey Everyone! I hope you liked the story! I remember when i started writing it after i had re-watched doomsday, an di was just thinking what would their thoughts be? And so i started to write. Anyway...i hope you liked it! Please review! They make me happy:) bye xxx**


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